A-Rod=Bitch-Tits

I find it quite funny that a world class athlete and purported best baseball player of all time was nicknamed Bitch-Tits by his teammates. This juicy detail and others are all a part of a flattering sneak-peek into Selena Roberts upcoming tell-all book about Bitch-Tits.

Yankees teammates, Roberts writes, nicknamed Rodriguez "B---h T--s" in 2005 because he put on 15 pounds in the offseason which included round pectorals, a condition called gynecomastia that can be caused by anabolic steroids.

Thank god, I thought when I first noticed a slight growth in my chestal region that I may have swine flu, but thankfully it's just gynecomastia, PHEW!! Several other gracious tidbits revealed about Bitch-Tits in the report are:

He started taking roids in high school... Wouldn't surprise me at this point. What we really need to do to get to the bottom of this, is see whether or not there was ever a significant increase in his bra sizes during his high school career. That would put an end to the matter real quick.

He's a shitty tipper at Hooters... His tits are probably bigger than the ones he sees there so why the hell do they deserve a tip?

While he doesn't tip at Hooters, he does however tip pitches to opposing players in blowout games in hopes of this treatment being returned to him... Typical egotistical star player trying to pad his stats, or should I say stat his pads. Get it? Pads as in tits, HAHAHAHA! Okay yea it's getting a bit old by now.

PS- Does anyone else find what Selena Roberts is doing to be a lesser form of witch hunting? Maybe she started this book without the intentions of uncovering every dirty detail about Bitch-Tits, and this is just the information she is gathering. Like, I hate Bitch-Tits just as much as the next guy, but it just seems wrong to expose all of this shit about one man. I vow, that when I inevitably become a famous sports journalistic, to NOT make it my job to tear down the reputation of any one player. But I still love this shit, cause it gives me Crick content, and calling A-Rod "Bitch-Tits" is really fun.

A-Rod Now Being Known As Bitch-Tits- Sick