Regular Season College Basketball!!!!

So Duke is playing North Carolina tonight in Cameron. As a Duke alumnus, I guess this game is kind of important to some people I know, but honestly, who cares? The regular season in college basketball is the third-most important section of the whole process, behind conference tournaments and the actually very important NCAA tournament. I think that one's in March.
Regardless of who wins this game tonight, it's likely that the one that goes farther in the ACC tournament will cop a 1 seed and the other will be a lowly 2 seed and they'll obviously be fucked because a 2 seed has never won the title.
It kills me to say this as a casual Duke fan--OMG ITS LIKE ROOTING FOR THE YANKEES!!--but this game is totally meaningless because Duke has absolutely no chance in March. I know this will hurt the feelings of Duke Vitale and all of those pre-med/BME Cameron Crazies, but it's simply true. Remember last year? Duke is the same team. They have no inside presence other than fucking Brian Zoubek, who was better at using his Macbook during chem class than he was at basketball playing. They have no reliable go-to guy in crunch time, and pretty much always settle for stupid mid-range jumpers in big spots, unless Gerald Henderson actually decides that he's good and tries to dunk. But the point is, Duke lost last year in the Sweet 32 and that will happen again once they run into a team that can score inside and slow the game down. Just imagine what Blake "Crazy Eyes" Griffin would do against Duke's soft underbelly. He would seriously pop off for like 65 and 30 and probably just kill Zoubek by dunking the ball through his skull.
UNC is overrated too. They're probably talented enough to get far in the tourney, but Tyler "Godzilla Gorilla" Hansbrough just isn't a big game player. He will also get dominated by Crazy Eyes if they ever go head to head.
I think you all get my point. This game is totally meaningless, because right after it all we'll be doing is looking forward to the March tourney. This game is a big deal for all those pre-meds and BMEs and UNC frat dudes, but in the grand scheme of the college basketball big picture, this game is not important. So you can all just relax with your "[Name] is UNC DUKE TONIGHT!!!!!" Facebook statuses. We know the game is tonight; we just don't care.
Besides, Wake Forest is the best team in the ACC. This is just a match-up between the 2nd and 3rd best teams in the 2nd best conference in the NCAA, and since 2x3x2 = 12, that makes this the 12th most important game this regular season. So why are we all busting a nut over it?

Duke-UNC - Whatever